On the very first day of work i was immediately overwhelmed with the thought "what on earth have I gotten myself into?" I have never worked in the mountains, been in the desert or built anything resembling a fence in my life. I mentioned to my assistant crew leader the next day that I didn't think this job was right for me. She made me promise to stay through week three and then decide and i agreed.
Well, week three, here we are. I dont like to admit when Im wrong, but in this case, Im alright with it.
Honestly this is one of the most difficult things Ive done. Breaking outside my comfort zone is a challenge for me, and this is about as far outside my comfort zone as it gets. But every time I think about giving up theres somebody there telling me to keep going, or some beautiful new place that i cant bring myself to leave. In spite of the struggle and doubt, I know this is exactly where I need to be right now.
I owe a lot of that to the people.Its a rare thing in life that you are able to find a group of people that you can put so much faith in after such a short amount of time, and an even rarer thing to know that they have faith in you too.I cant tell my crew members that whuile theyre trying to have me write a rap for the blog post, and one of them has an old cow pelvis bone on his face, but they'll read this later and laugh about how cheesy it is.
I wasn't kidding when i said mountains
are unfamiliar territory. Coming into all of this is like starting at the bottom, and im staring up at the peak thinking "theres no way I can do that"And since its only week three, im only part of the way up, and im tired, I could turn back, but then i pause and look around and realize that there is no better place to be. Also I know that there are no other people like this at the top, and they will be cheering me on as i reach the top(because they always do), and Ill look back at the progress ive made and be proud, and happy, and better off for it. And when the season ends, Ill go home and continue my life as a person who has seen the top of the mountain and knows she can climb another one.
Comments